The Tweet Watch
Your source of tweets that matter!
Dec 26th 1900. I landed on dark Flannan Isle only to find the lighthouse devoid of life, but for a half eaten meal and an overturned chair. I totally shat it.
After predicting the U.S election 87 days ago, I now predict Celtic will beat Barcelona 2-1. Run, don't walk to the bookies, my pretties!
Ach there's Scotland got beat by Wales. No matter. Get 'em next time. We'll support you ever more, Scot- Aye RIGHT. FUCK OFF LEVEIN.
Andy Murray. Let's do this, you wee diamond. Revenge is a dish best served at 138 miles per hour.
"We have found a new particle. The God particle. It is a big day for us here at CERN." - John Terry
Beautiful morning in Glasgow* *Glasgow reserves the right to change the terms & conditions at a moment's notice and pish doon awe day.
5/15/2012 3:58 AM
I'm glad that Craig Whyte has been banned from Scottish football for life but I hope Rangers do the right thing and give him his pound back.
4/24/2012 3:31 AM
Shame @BBCAMERICA is only interested in English comedy rather than the whole of the UK. It's missing out on some great Scottish shows.
5/4/2011 2:08 PM
If Obama has to produce a birth certificate, George Bush Jr. has to produce all the death certificates he was responsible for. Seems fair.
4/27/2011 2:02 PM
I got my 9-yr-old with a belter of an April Fools this morning. I told him Gaddafi had fled Libya. But he hasn't. Should have seen his face.
4/1/2011 4:50 AM
Jennifer Garner's first case to solve as Miss Marple will be to investigate the spinning noise coming from Agatha Christie's grave.
3/30/2011 7:47 AM
Asda dating? No,no,no,no,no. Too high class. Wake me up when Lidl's or Farmfoods begin that service. More chance of getting your hole then.
3/7/2011 11:17 AM
America has banned the import of Scottish haggis for 40 years because it contains sheep lung......But you can buy a sniper rifle at Walmart.
1/23/2011 6:46 AM
Gail Sheridan is to stand at the next Scottish parliamentary elections. Should be a fun night. No-one mention the Swingometer.
1/14/2011 6:40 AM
When David Starkey called Glasgow a "Provincial Backwater" this morning I got so mad I nearly smashed up my moonshine still with my banjo.
10/25/2010 5:24 AM
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