MaleThoughts_ | The Tweet Watch

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MaleThoughts_
70,207 Followers.
68 Friends.

Comedian. I tweet what you feel. Quotes, jokes & more! BUSINESS: Malethoughts1@gmail.com

A boyfriend should always send you a goodmorning and goodnight text even if you don't talk all day, just to let you know you're on his mind.
Feb 27 no reply

Guys are like bras, they hook up behind your back. Girls however.. like condoms, they spend more time in ur wallet than on ur d-ck.
Feb 9 no reply

Over-thinking ruins you. Ruins the situation, twists things around, makes u worry & just makes everything much worse than it actually is...
Feb 10 no reply

ME: "OMG I have to tell you this story about-" *starts laughing* *deep breath* "Ok there was this-" *starts laughing*
Feb 6 no reply

I overreact. I underestimate. I overestimate. I over think everything. I dream big. And when I say I love you, I'm not lying.
Feb 7 no reply

My problem is I can't stay mad. I always end up forgiving people, even when they don't deserve it.
Dec 17 no reply

You insult me: I can handle it... You insult my best friend: I'm going to break your face.
Feb 23 no reply

Ghost hunters: Can you communicate with us? *Door creeks* Ghost hunters: Oh so your name is Laura??
Mar 23 no reply

Adele: "I set fire to the rain!" Spongebob: "Bitch, please. I make campfires underwater..."
Mar 7 no reply

I hate it when you talk to someone every single day and then it just stops. All of a sudden neither of you say a word to each other..
Feb 2 no reply

Telling someone that you're going to bed when you're actually not, and then having to hold back from posting things on Facebook/Twitter.
Feb 3 no reply

Wouldn't it be nice if your iPod could detect your mood and make a playlist for it?
Feb 5 no reply

Dear God, I wanna take a minute, not to ask for anything from you. But simply to say thank you, for all I have.
Feb 2 no reply

"Are you single?" "No, I'm plural." "No, i meant are you free this Friday?" .. "No, I'm expensive."
Mar 4 no reply

When you truly care for someone, their mistakes never change your feelings because it's the mind that gets angry but the heart still cares.
Feb 2 no reply

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